I realized I needed help when the things in my life weren’t harmonious anymore and it felt like a slow death. But i didn’t know where to start. I felt that shame and stereotype of how people of color don’t seek professional help because of course “it’s a while people thing”. I could feel the change wanting to happen beneath the burrows of my soul, it wanted to show me I was ready to break free of the stress and drama and really live. I took trips to bookstores and researched how to basically live when you feel like giving up.
One suggesting in particular was resonating on levels I cant even explain, yoga.
*Photograph by: Michael Ward
Instance #1 yoga chose me….
While doing my research, yoga was becoming a universal theme in the books I chose to read. It screamed at me through the pages. Being mindful and practicing self love is the epitome of the journey I wanted to embark on and yoga aids in just that. Okay cool!
Instance #2 yoga was still kicking it with me…
Yoga wasn’t actually the farthest thing from mind because I’m an athlete and it’s often favored when you’re actively using every part of your body. So I looked into classes in the city and asked some friends to go. Luckily they’ve always wanted to try it too so this made the first dive easy. Great! When are we going?
Instance #3, yoga was like “girl get off your ass and go”….
My partner at the time was really big on education me about everything under the sun and we would often talk about how yoga enhances human sexuality, opening your third eye, provide discipline,boosts your creativity ( we’re both artists) and a list of other things that made life great! So why not try it? Love shoudl influence you like that.
There was no escaping this yoga thing so I finally booked my first class and it was the most terrifying thing in the world *at the time*. It was hard not to pick up my mat and just leave but talk about the lack of motivation I would throw upon myself to get it together. Something had to work, I was tired of feeling depression taking over my body.
I stayed, gave myself a kiss for pushing throw and felt amazing afterwards. So what if I had to work on beginning level practices, that is the beuaty of growth to me. The signs were always there!
What has been knocking at your door and you haven’t taken the initiative to answer?
As always shed layers, give light,feel peace